Anatomy of Change

Most of us say we want it. We’re not happy with the status quo. But when it actually arrives — often uninvited — we can find ourselves overwhelmed, confused, or tempted to turn back to what feels familiar.

Why does change feel so hard, even when it’s something we deeply desire?

Over the years, I’ve learned that it’s not because we’re doing something wrong. It’s because we’ve misunderstood the anatomy of change itself — how God designed our hearts, minds, and nervous systems to grow, heal, and transform.

Once we begin to understand that process, we can stop fighting ourselves. We can learn to cooperate with it, and with God, to move through change with greater ease and confidence.

In this month’s blog, I want to take a closer look at what I call the anatomy of change—what it really means and why it matters. When we begin to understand how change actually works, we can navigate its messy middle with more grace, courage, and peace.

Most of us long for the beautiful things God has promised — to grow, to live with purpose, to experience the abundant life He’s planned. Yet even when we pray, believe, and do “all the right things,” it can feel like we’re still waiting. For many years, I wondered why the desires of my heart seemed just beyond my reach.

We want change because we’re rarely content to stay the same, yet we fear it because change feels uncertain. That’s normal. Our brains are wired to seek comfort and avoid danger — and change, even good change, feels risky.

It wasn’t until I realized that God wasn’t withholding my dreams — He was preparing me for them — that everything began to make sense. I needed to become the kind of woman who could steward the size of the dreams He had placed in my heart. And that meant walking through the uncomfortable parts of transformation.

It wasn’t neat or easy, and it stretched me in ways I never expected. But over time, God taught me not only how change works — both spiritually and neurologically — but also how my unique process unfolds. With that understanding came more peace. I stopped fighting change and started flowing with it, trusting that every step, no matter how messy, was shaping me into who He created me to be.

Change touches every one of us, but the way we move through it is deeply personal. Each of us has a unique “change process” shaped by our story — our upbringing, family dynamics, and early experiences of love and pain. Those moments formed the beliefs we now carry about life, about God, and about ourselves.

Some of those beliefs are life-giving and true. Others quietly work against us, whispering lies like, “You’re not enough,” “You’ll never change,” or “You should be further along by now.”

These old beliefs live deep within the subconscious and often “run the show” when we try to grow. We set new goals, start with enthusiasm, and then something inside quietly resists. Before long, we feel stuck or frustrated and start to wonder what’s wrong with us.

The truth is, nothing’s wrong. The very system God designed for our protection — our brain, our nervous system, and the patterns we learned to stay safe — is simply doing its job. It just hasn’t realized yet that it’s safe to change.

Our beliefs form the blueprint for our lives. They shape our thoughts, our emotions, and the choices we make each day.

The good news is that our brains are designed by God to be changeable. Science calls this neuroplasticity — the brain’s ability to rewire itself through new thoughts, new experiences, and new focus. Scripture calls it “the renewing of the mind.” (Romans 12:2)

Every thought we dwell on creates a pathway in the brain — like a groove in a dirt road. The more we travel that road, the deeper that groove becomes. This can work for us or against us. When we begin to focus on what is “true, honorable, right, pure, and lovely” (Philippians 4:8), we start forming new pathways that align with God’s truth rather than our old fears.

This may sound simple, but it’s not easy. Change rarely is.

In my own life, I’ve seen this truth unfold again and again. I have walked through seasons that felt impossible—full of disappointment, uncertainty, and unanswered prayer. Yet, little by little, God helped me uncover the unhealthy beliefs that had quietly shaped my world and taught me how to dismantle them. What a journey that has been! And now, I have the privilege of helping my clients do the same. I get to watch them experience their own renewal, one thought at a time.

In the simplest of terms, that’s neuroplasticity in action — but it’s also faith in action.

Of course, no discussion of transformation would be complete without acknowledging that we have an adversary who works overtime to discourage and distract us.

The enemy loves to plant seeds of doubt just as we begin to grow: “Who do you think you are?” “You’ll never follow through.” “It’s too late.”

His lies can be convincing because they often carry a sliver of truth, just enough to sound believable. Depending on our background and past experiences, the adversary may not have to work very hard to convince us of our inadequacies.

Learning to discern whose voice we are listening to is essential. When we recognize the lies, we can replace them with the truth of who God says we are. As we do, we begin to create an atmosphere in our hearts and homes that the enemy doesn’t want to inhabit.

In the later weeks of Anatomy of Change, I teach practical ways to “take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5). It’s not about striving or fighting harder. It’s about recognizing what’s happening, stepping into the authority we already have in Christ, and making daily choices that align with His truth.

Transformation becomes possible when we stop battling the darkness and start standing firmly in the light.

If change feels hard right now, please remember — you are not alone. Everyone struggles with change. Even the strongest, most faith-filled people I know have moments when they question, resist, or fear what’s ahead.

But God uses every season of transition to deepen our trust, strengthen our character, and draw us closer to His heart. You don’t have to figure it all out. You simply have to say yes – to the process, and to the One who designed it.